Be The Worst

"It's better to hang out with people better than you. Pick out associates whose behavior is better than yours, and you'll drift in that direction."
-- Warren Buffett

This reminds of chapter 'Be The Worst' in The Passionate Programmer...

Before starting my career in information technology, I was a professional jazz and blues saxophonist. As a musician, I had the good fortune of learning this lesson early on and sticking to it. Being the worst guy in the band means always playing with people who are better than you.

Now, why would you always choose to be the worst person in a band? “Isn’t it unnerving?” you ask. Yes, it’s extremely unnerving at first. As a young musician, I would find myself in situations where I was so obviously the worst guy in the band that I was sure I would stick out like a sore thumb. I’d show up to a gig and not even want to unpack my saxophone for fear I’d be forcefully ejected from the bandstand. I’d find myself standing next to people I looked up to, expected to perform at their level—sometimes as the lead instrument!

Without fail (thankfully!), something magical would happen in these situations: I would fit in. I wouldn’t stand out among the other musicians
as a star. On the other hand, I wouldn’t be obviously outclassed, either. This would happen for two reasons. The first reason is that I really wasn’t as bad as I thought. We’ll come back to this one later.

The more interesting reason that I would fit in with these superior musicians—my heroes, in some cases—is thatmy playing would transform itself to be more like theirs.

-- Chad Fowler in The Passionate Programmer

Affirmations for Belief Change

Lately have been struggling to change myself, to bring some changes in my life, to improve, to set free of certain baggage, limitations. Was trying to figure how to create scaffold to ensure that I do change this time, and not just ride the change wave for few days and then forget.

Then just few days ago was thinking about Beliefs, and then Values and Virtues - it struck that my thoughts are working in cycles. This is actually common sense, but when one is in rushing water (life in this case), its difficult to have a clear sense. Anyway I realized it, and it felt like that instead of just reminding myself and trying to change my thoughts, I really should be working on my incorrect Beliefs, inculcate better Values, and implement more Virtues in by life.

Strangely, since then have come across lots of stuff that help me get started. So sharing all encountered till now, in the same order...

1. First I encountered Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) - a form of psychotherapy created by Albert Ellis in the 1950's.
   
2. Then encountered this post by Steve Pavlina - Remove a Limiting Belief in About 20 Minutes
3. Tried one of Morty Lefkoe's Recreate Your Life free belief change  Encountered Affirmation CD site, and watched the video 'It Comes From Me'
4. Then also watched Affirmation 2006. It has Savage Garden's Affirmation song in background (lyrics here)

All the above set of events have been quite interesting. I went from state of cluelessness, and somewhat confusion - to sense of clarity along with quite some inspiration. Thanks to all those who have shared this stuff on net.

Hope this helps others.

del.icio.us/vikramsjn

Links for 2009-10-21 [del.icio.us] Posted: 22 Oct 2009 12:00 AM PDT What is Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT)? - REBT Network: Albert Ellis | Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy whenever we become upset, it is not the events taking place in our lives that upset us; it is the beliefs that we hold that cause us to become depressed, anxious, enraged, etc.